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Jan 24, 2014

AHS: COVEN - GO TO HELL

This week a bunch of characters finally got what they deserved, so even the excessively long "silent film" intro could not ruin the episode.

Queenie wants to know what happened to Marie, so she goes to hell, which takes a form of a fast food restaurant for her, to speak to Papa Legba. He tells her that Delphine cut Marie into many pieces and spread them around New Orleans. Queenie asks Papa to make Laveau mortal again, as she's clearly in the breach of contract now that she can't physically fulfill Papa's requests, and he agrees.

Delphine takes a tour around her former house and is displeased to find that some details of her life are slightly exaggerated. She lures the tour guide to the attic, calls bullshit on her, knocks her out and takes her place, where Queenie finds her. The black witch gives LaLarie a chance to repent and make amends, but the sadist is not sorry for what she's done and even dares to give a speech about the hypocrisy of modern world. A serial killer judging Antony Weiner (DANGER!) and Paula Deen - what could be funnier? As she finishes with some racial statement, Queenie puts a knife in her chest and sends her to hell - LaLaurie's attic, where she must watch how her daughter is tortured by Laveau, who, by the way, is sentenced to harm an innocent for eternity.

Delia regains her inner sight and sees that Fiona intends to kill all the witches, including Delia herself. She pays a visit to the Axeman and tells him that her mother, being a heartless bitch she is, will definitely ditch him (she should know). He later finds Fiona's plane ticket and confronts her. She admits she doesn't love him and has never planned to stay with him forever, so he kills her with his axe and feeds her body to alligators, and we never get to learn what happened to the cat she used to have when she was a kid.

Zoe and Kyle return to the academy, as Zoe resurrects some rude guy after her boyfriend kills him, and thinks she's the next Supreme. Misty, released by Queenie and Cordelia from the tomb comes back as well and beats the shit out of Madison. The spectacular fight is interrupted by the Axeman, who is stupid enough to think he could kill all the witches on his own. Delia sees what he's done to her mom, and he dies exactly like he did the first time - stabbed many-many times.

Now that the old Supreme is gone, the girls must attempt to perform the seven wonders to establish who takes the throne.

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